DELIVERY MAN Reviewed by Helena Kealey
The film of the year is out.
Predicted to win all the Oscars, 12 Years A Slave is a five-star, cinema-changing masterpiece.
Unfortunately, on the week when this phenomenon hit our screens, this reviewer was dragged by philistine friends from cinema screen 8 into screen 4 and forced to watch Delivery Man.
Which was rubbish.
Delivery Man is a remake of a 2011 French-Canadian film called Starbuck.
And when I say remake, I mean joke for joke, scene for scene, line for line. This film, once acted by men with silly accents was re-enacted by men with sillier accents and with less enthusiasm for the script and, possibly, life.
It’s the story of a pathetic middle-aged wastrel, who on discovering that his girlfriend is pregnant, is also told that the 533 sperm donations he made for money in his youth have turned into lawsuit-wielding children, 142 of whom are demanding to know the identity of their, father.
David Wozniak (Vince Vaughn) decides to help a few of them along with their lives, until he feels confident enough to shout at the by-then mother of his newborn and insist he’s prime father material.
Next time, I’ll be in screen 8.